Who Should Say Sorry First?

I have a lot of my mind today and I feel this quote perfectly sums up yesterday and how I feel today.

I am going to make a long story short (I tend to make short stories long, so we will see how this is gonna fly) but last night was not one of my favorites with Boyfriend. I get home to work earlier then he does (the joys of going to work at 6am) and was in an a pretty good mood until Boyfriend got home. He came home and barely spoke two words to me. I have never seen him like this, I had know he wasn’t feeling good earlier in the day but that was about it. At first I chalked it up to feeling like crap, because lets be honest, who wants to take when in reality you want to throw up?! But back to my point, it caused me to shut down as well. He acted like he didn’t want me around and didn’t care about anything that was coming out of my mouth. Then, we sat down for dinner and he asked me when I was acting weird and not speaking (which is abnormal for me, I am kind of a chatter box) and I calmly explained that I felt like he didn’t want me around.. he got mad at that and we barely spoke the rest of the evening. (I would guess maybe 10 words spoken between the two of us that had any relevance to anything.) He fell asleep early, with no kiss goodnight and that was that.

But while I was still awake in bed, I was thinking who is going to apologize first? Who should really say sorry first? I mean of course in anger I would said, I will not say I’m sorry because I’m not sorry and I didn’t do anything wrong. But then I thought about it, is that really the best thing to do for us and our relationship? I don’t think I did anything wrong, but don’t we all when we are angry? I also realized maybe this is me being stubborn and angry. I fell asleep thinking this, only to wake up and think about it again. I decided I was not going to say sorry first because I am stubborn. Boyfriend apologized this morning (first), told me medicine made him feel the way he was and that he always wants me around and loves me.

I tend to say things I don’t mean when I am angry and yesterday I thought instead of doing that I was going to keep quiet. I guess sometimes you just can’t win either way.

But on to good things! Today I have another link up! This time it is with Whitney over at I Wore Yoga Pants To Work. I chose this song because when ever I hear it I sing it at the top of my lungs!

Where Have I Been and a Link-Up

I didn't go missing again. I promise. I just got bombard with work and learning HTML (you'll see the finished product at a later date) that I forgot to blog. I'm sorry - forgive me? Okay! 
Well yesterday, was kind of uneventful except I started button swapping! I am so new and behind the times with blogging that I didn't know what to do. I am thankful for some lovely ladies who assisted me and now I have a button and can swap (or pay for advertising, but not ready for that crazy stuff yet).  Alright, I do have my link-up going up today with the lovely Two Thirds Hazel, whose blog I read before I even started my own. Excited to participate. 

I'm Sure You Want To Know...

Today I decided to let everyone learn a little more about crazy little me. Since I am new to the blogging community, I have learn (an experienced as a blog reader) that you want to know all about the person your reading about.
So I present to you…

I am afraid of the dark, so afraid that I have to have someone sleep with me or have the TV on all night. 

In college, I majored in Psychology because I didn’t know what else to do, but have no desire to do anything in the psychology field. 

I have never lived out of the state of Florida but I feel like I don’t belong here. 

I did not get my drivers license until I was almost 19 years old, but I got my permit at 15. 

I am an only child and my parents did that so I couldn’t fight with any siblings. 

I hate washing my hair and I mean HATE IT and tend to not do it often. 

I have never been a big drinker of alcohol, I do like a good glass of Moscato though. 

I hate tomatoes, and that includes ketchup, I will not touch my food if a tomato has. 

I could eat anything dipped in buffalo sauce, and I mean anything. 

My favorite food is french fries (they are even better dipped in buffalo and ranch). 

My favorite movie is Mary Poppins. 

When I am sick, I have to watch Beauty and the Beast and Hunger Games. 

My brains goes fifty miles a minute, and I constantly think in terms of writing a journal (maybe that’s why I started blogging).

I have three best friends, but two live away from me. 

I wear glasses and contact, but rarely will you find me in contact unless I am wearing sunglasses all day.

I am obsessed with sunglasses (I worked in a sunglass store for almost 4 years).

People say I resemble Mayim Bialik (from Blossom and Big Bang Theory) but I don’t see it. 

I Was In Miami B!tch!

Welcome to Monday!
I was thinking I need some catchy Monday line, but I couldn't come up with one because I'm so dang tired from Miami! Yes, Boyfriend and I took a mini vacation to Miami. We went down for a car meet originally but then decided to make a weekend out of it.
Lets start my weekend recap with the beginning of the weekend, Friday night. We did nothing. Well, we took Kylie to my parents. We had to be up early Saturday morning so we called it an early night.
On Saturday, we woke up super early (6am!) and head out and meet Boyfriend’s car group to caravan down to Ft Lauderdale so we could go to a car meet. We ended up caravanning with about 20 different cars down and Boyfriend enjoyed the ride. (I personally was indifferent since I was just the passenger.) But anyways, once we got down there and to the actual place where the meet was, we found out it was $25 for us to eat and hangout. We weren’t really feeling it (granted I was excited to hang out with my only car club friend that I had (she also knows nothing about cars)) and we left about 10 minutes after getting there. We decided to go see some family (since that was the reason we decided to stay down in Miami, his cousin was in from out of town). Well, it ended up the his Aunt (who we were staying with) had a full house but offered a couch for us to stay on, which was fine. So we made it down, and hung out with the family and had a great time. His aunt threw a dinner party (with stone crabs!) which awesome.
Sunday, was a different story. We woke up and went to have breakfast with the family. One of his cousin’s left early to catch a flight back, and we were going to hang out with her brother. Well it ended up that everyone ditched us, his aunt (she got sick), his uncle (had to work, it’s tax season and all), and his other cousin (he got angry at his dad, long silly story). We made the best of it though. Boyfriend took me all around Miami and showed me the sights. We have a good time with each other. We had lunch and headed back to his aunts. When we got there no was there, so we decided to take a nap. Fast forward an hour and half and still no one. At this point, I figured it was best for us to leave. No one realized we were gone for about an hour. I blame this on the family friends. They made us feel so unwelcome this weekend it was crazy. But that does not matter because we made the best of a bad situation.

The Carlyle Hotel - the facade for The Birdcage

Sitting in traffic so might as well take a selfie

Downtown Miami

Dinner Time!!

I have one again fallen victim to getting busy and not blogging. I have noticed that this is going to be a lot harder then I originally thought.

But anyways back on topic. Last night I made dinner. I do make dinner most nights, but decided I was tired of having the same thing over and over again. So I pulled up Pinterest (of course I did, where else do you find recipes of things that become impossible to make but look so good).

So I was going to take pictures of this meal as I went, but it got messy and I was following the recipe on my phone (since Boyfriend commandeered the iPad). But I will give you my recipe that I changed up a bit.

So what did I make exactly? I made buffalo meatballs (who said it needs to be football season for those and I wanted to use my new CrockPot) and home made French Fries. So I will post my recipe for both but I will say the meatballs came out a little too spicy (for me and Boyfriend's tastes, and we love spicy) and the Fries came out salty (and I love salt). Also, I don't really measure when I cook so I am eyeballing measurements (or using what the original recipe says).

The Buffalo Style Meatballs

1lb ground chicken (you can also use ground turkey)

2oz cream cheese (I used the whipped kind, and took a table spoons and put    3 dollops in)

2 eggs

1 cup bread crumbs (I used the Italian kind) 

To taste: black pepper, salt, garlic and blue cheese crumbles

1 btle Franks Red Hot Sauce Buffalo flavor

2oz butter

- Pre heat oven to 415 degrees.

- Combine all ingratiates in a bowl (except the Frank’s Red Hot Sauce and butter) and mix (I used my hands) until the mixture comes together into a blob. Then roll the blob into smaller 1” balls (mine did not come out like balls, more like plops) and place on greased cookie sheets.

- Place in over for 10 minutes, until the balls are solid enough that they won’t fall apart in the slow cooker. While the the meatballs are cooking melt the butter and combine with the Hot Sauce.

- Place the meatballs in the slow cooker and cover with Hot Sauce mixture (I will admit I forgot the butter, but when I reheated the next day, it helped the spiciness).

Homemade Skinner French Fries
6 yukon gold potatoes (I made extra so I would have lunch for Boyfriend and I the next day)
olive oil
garlic salt
pepper
italian seasoning
sprinkle cheese

- Preheat oven to 415

- Slice potatoes into a fry shape (you can cut them anyway you want, I did traditional french fire shape. Make sure they are dry before you bake them, it will help them get crispier)

- Cover cookie sheet with tin foil and lay the dry potatoes out. Drizzle olive oil over top and season to your liking.

- Bake for 20 minutes then flip and cook for additional 15 min or until potatoes are to your liking.

Boyfriend and I enjoyed dinner but consumed a ton of water.

I hope you enjoy them. 

It's About to Get Real Up In Here

So I'm about to get real personal up in here. I guess I get personal every day since this is my space on the interwebs, but today is something super duper personal. 
Anyways, something I have struggled with is my weight. I know thats a typical girl thing, but mine has gotten really bad over the past few years, 5 years to be exact. 
About 5 years ago I started a new job (which I have now left) and dealt with my boss calling fat and a oompa loopa everyday. He broke down any self-esteem I had and I came home and cried almost every night. The sad thing is, I was not fat in anyway. I was about 4'11/5'0 (depending on how I'm feeling that day) and about 105lbs. I hold my weight in my boobs and stomach area so I look heavier on the top half of my body. You would think that would cause me to turn to starving myself and loose a ton of weight. It was the exact opposite. I turned to food. 
Here is where it gets super personal. Let me preface what I am about to do with this: I do not believe in asking a girls weight or age. That is a personal thing for her and typically most girls don't feel great sharing it, even if its an awesome number. I also don't judge myself based on my number weight, I judge myself on my jean size and how my clothes fit. I don't care if I weight 300 lbs (which I don't) but fit into a size 2 pants (which I also know would not happen). But back to the point at hand, I am going to share my weight. I now weight 146 lbs (I fluctuate between that and 150). I have gained 40lbs in 2 years. That is a lot of weight. The worst part is, I have even less self-esteem then I had in 4 years ago because of my weight. 
I know I want to change. And I know I need to change. I just can't change. I was never the healthiest of eaters (but I have gotten a lot better thanks to Boyfriend) and I never really had to exercise. Now I need to and have no motivation to. I know I need to. 

(Link)

I found this quote today on Pinterest (my sad obsession when it's slow at work) and that is what prompted me to write this post. To declare to all who read this (and I know right now there aren't many) that I don't want to be at war with myself anymore. I am not sure how I am going to change but it is time I stop feeling that way I do (and I know Boyfriend, who loves me just the way I am, will be happy that I finally making this decision) and become a whole person again. 

So any help with motivation will help. I need to hold my self accountable. 

It's been real folks. 

Your Typical Weekend Recap

So it's Monday.... boo! 
But that means it's time for weekend recap post Valentines style. 
So Friday was Valentine's Day. I was a typical adult and went to work and while there I caught a cold (the joys of working in a super small office). So I came home and canceled Valentine's day (we were going to go out for a nice dinner). Instead we ordered pizza and watched the Dallas Buyer Club (not your Valentine's day movie, but a good movie nonetheless). Made it an early night and went to bed.  Saturday morning Boyfriend had a hair appointment (which took 4 hours!) and I stayed home to try and feel better. When he finally made it home we decided to go get lunch (I promise this story gets better). While at lunch we decided to go look at 80" TVs (why? I'm not sure but I always entertain Boyfriend's thoughts of why it is so important to eventually have an 80" TV).  While there I told him we should look at a vacuum cleaner, which we have desperately needed, due to Princess Smushy (the dog) and her crazy amount of shedding. We had been looking at Dyson's for a while now, but didn't want to pull the trigger on the large price tag. But this weekend, we decided it was time. So our Valentines gift to each other was a vacuum cleaner. (Yes, a cleaning product.) It okay though, because now I want to clean everything and I'm sure Boyfriend is okay with that. We decided to go out on Saturday night for a few drinks with a friend. It was freezing (Florida freezing that is, a whopping 54 degrees) and we are stupid and decided to sit outside. It was fun though, we froze our butts off and listen to some good ol' Irish music. 
Sunday we woke up late (which never happens) and decided to drive and see Boyfriend's dad. I have never seen where Boyfriend grew up so I was excited. He drove me all around and showed me his childhood home, his best friend's house, his school, and basically anything that related to what it was like growing up. He even took me to where he used to work (at the mall) and had lunch there (by the way, I must just be a city girl but this mall had 3 restaurants... 3 places to eat in the food court). It was a fun day to hang out with his family and get to know them. 
The weekend all in all was a good one, however I still have the stupid cold so Monday sucks. 

In Honor of Val-e-n-tines Day!

So I haven't fallen off the planet nor has my body been taken over by those body snatcher people. Work has been crazy busy and I have been trying to work on my design for my blog. It probably would have been easier to pay someone, but well I never do things the easier way (or the most time consuming way). But any-who, I am back and back to committing to blogging a lot more (and with my current track record that won't be hard). 
But lets get this thing going...
It's almost VALENTINE'S DAY!! The day in which we tell the ones we love only one day a year (okay, I tell Boyfriend multiple times a day how much I love him and Kylie (the dog)). 
So I decided to dedicate this post to my relationship. Boyfriend will make up a lot of my posts and well, no one really knows anything about him or us (and by us I mean our relationship).  So how did we meet? We met online, match.com to be exact. I was very hesitant to join. I actually joined as a joke. An old co worker of mine and I wanted to write a book about our online dating experiences. (Well, that didn't exactly happen because I only met one person.)  I also was not very proactive on the site because I didn't write anyone who didn't write me first. Okay, but back to Boyfriend. He wrote me after I was on the site for 2 weeks (I only signed up for a month). He wrote this long message, like he actually read my profile. I didn't read it, okay I read some of it to make sure he was intelligent but after about 4 lines I was thinking he is cute, so I'll write him back. We exchanged maybe 4 messages until I wrote and told him I hate waiting for responses and just gave him my number to text me. (Yup, I did it first!)  We texted back and forth all day long for probably about a week I would say.  Finally we had our first phone conversation, we always had something to talk about and stayed on the phone for over an hour (he stayed outside talking to me instead of going into a movie with his friends, it was cute (not crazy)).  I decided it was time to meet. Since I am such a huge Disney fan (and I needed to make sure he could handle that) I told him our first date should be there. He was down. I was nervous to spend all day with him and only bring one car (what if he was crazy and going to kill me behind some ride?) So I decided we needed to meet the day before for dinner (I called it "an out" with no strings attached, if we didn't hit it off, it was fine). I didn't feel good that night, so we decided to meet for breakfast the next day before the parks. I will admit, breakfast was a little awkward because I was sitting with someone I barely knew, but it was okay I decided he wasn't a serial killer and I would go to Disney with him. On our way, (he drove) he sang Mirrors by Justin Timberlake in the car. He didn't care if I was there or not, he felt comfortable enough to belt it out, and I love that. Well, our first date went great and I knew at that moment he was special and I wanted him around for a very long time (forever). 
But I got nervous, and I wasn't sure I was ready to be in a relationship (like everyone I have had my heart broken one to many times) and I basically pushed him so far away I thought he was going to call it quits. But he stuck in there and waited until I was ready. (I even made him sleep on the couch the first few times he slept over :)) He asked me out about a month after our first date and we have been together ever since.

Our First Date. 

  

We are now living together and I couldn't be happier (and I think he is super happy too:)) He is my everything and I am lucky that I found him.  Maybe online dating doesn't suck...  

Our first vacation to Nashville